The BDSM community is close knit in most communities all over the world When you find your happy dungeon, you have found a home in which you can enjoy your fetishes in a safe space. BDSM play is ever changing and looks different for all players. I could not create an exhaustive list of all the versions of play that can be developed. It is heavily dependent on the wants of the players. Many individuals outside of the community believe that BDSM is some sort of abuse because they see the relationship between dom and sub as something the sub has no control over. This is so far from the truth and the reality of the practice.
How does someone enter the world of BDSM? This is different for everyone. A little exploration and you can find your local dungeons and/or swingers clubs. I am so excited that I can offer a place to play in Columbus, OH where all humans are free to come and play. Newbies can inquire about the space and visit on Thursdays so that they can explore their pleasure points. I opened Shades Oasis with the intent to offer the BDSM community a location in an area highly underserved. The Midwest is known for its sexual activity and diversity in what people find pleasure in. I have been hosting kink parties all over the East Coast and opening my own space is a real dream come true. Masters in my area have helped me in creating a dungeon space where submissive and dominates can receive the pleasure they seek. So, if you are ever in the area, come check out Shades Oasis. As a Clinical Sexologist I guide individuals through multiple orgasms and deliver a workshop during my events. One of the things that many people ask me to talk to them about is what to do with the rest of the penis born body. Meaning, after a hand job or a blow job then what?
I always suggest penis worshipping. Phallicism is what genital worshipping is. It is mainly performed in cuckold-type scenarios and can be done with no contact at all. An understanding of the penis structure will help in understanding pleasure points that you can stimulate to add additional pleasure and excitement. A penis is twice as long as you think. Half the length of the penis is inside of the body. A healthy penis has five to six erections per day. Most of them nocturnal. While it is not clear why it happens, it is a sign that the penis is healthy. Individuals who understand their penis health can speak up about their penis pleasure. Letting the worshipper know what is going to work for them. A penile erection can point in virtually any direction, straight ahead, left, or right, up, or down, there’s no right or wrong. The opening at the tip of the penis is the opening of the urethra tube. This tube is where sperm and urine pass through. Usually, the owner may feel a full bladder when they are about to ejaculate. As the giver, knowing that the urethra opening can be stimulated for pleasure, means you can add a move when you get to the mouth portion of the ceremony.
As the giver, be sure you stay mindful that the penis has no bone. It is very possible to break the penis through vigorous sex but is less likely to happen if you are performing a blow job. Worshipping requires more of a verbal or fellatio activity. Saying things like, “Your penis/dick is so powerful”, or “It looks so powerful”. Keeping eye contact, whisper things that lets them know you appreciate the privilege of worshipping the penis. The same with fellatio. Allow yourself to enjoy the penis. Moaning lets them know you are loving it. However, you express your passion, let it wash over you so that you can have pleasure as well. What you need to do is focus on the penis unless the discussion was had about touching other areas of the genitals. For example, the raphe is the dividing line that runs across the middle of their genitalia from the anus to the tip of the penis, down over the perineum, scrotum, and shaft. You can add intensity to the orgasm by using your tongue to trace over the line and teasing them into your mouth. The perineum is REALLY sensitive and worth exploring. Press your knuckles gently into this spot and start massaging. Right as they are about to orgasm, push your knuckles a little deeper to extend the fireworks.
A quick tip, don’t make this your porno appearance. Don’t say anything that is not believable or personal. This is meant to build a bond between you two so there is no need to shout your compliments. You really can focus on anything but try to be as genuine as possible. Commenting on taste, length, girth, smoothness, lumps, veins, and bumps. This will give them newfound confidence in their naked form and free themselves from insecurities or they can dominate you in your submissive role.
Try to spice things up with something totally pleasurable like a reverse finger job. Tell them that the “penis is so large”, or “your girth is amazing” while you are making two tight rings around the penis with your thumb and index finger, stacking them one on top of the other in the middle of the shaft. Twist the rings in opposite directions moving from middle to the top and base of the shaft at the same time. This will cause great excitement that they will feel in their belly. Testicles have a seam that keeps the scrotums in separate sacks. It is a nerve rich pleasure trail that runs top to bottom along the scrotum. Cradle the balls in one hand while gently pressing the first two fingertips of your other hand into the top of the crease, close to where the testicles connect to the base of the penis. Then trace downward with your fingers until you reach the bottom of the scrotum. It is important to be deliberate in your movements and keep eye contact with your mate.
You can also add pleasure by using a cock ring to extend the play. The more wet the fellatio is, the better it feels for the receiver. Keep adding wetness as you move the penis in your mouth. To add visual pleasure, place your hands behind your back submissively and allow him to “Feed you their dick” upon request. That’s right, you need to worship the penis continuously verbally through the entire scene. They love to see your eyes and the expression you are making to truly gauge how much you are enjoying yourself if that is part of the play. It could include humiliation in which they may be dominating you to worship their penis with a goal of not giving you any release. When you do perform, be sure that you are in a comfortable position to withstand however long it may take for the Dom to allow himself to cum. Happily, accept the ejaculation and let him know “How great it is to taste him.”
Some more about penis worship that needs to be mentioned is that it has been an ancient eastern practice for generations. The act has been taught by master tantra practitioners as the experience can be quite intense and sensual. Cuckolding or humiliation might be something you want to give as a penis owner. Enjoy the experience with your mate and worship the penis with them. The possibilities are open to what ever your comfort level is. What boundary did you set and what are the goals you want to reach as a receiver and a giver? The number one issue that penis owners have around receiving worship is sexual anxiety. Maybe they have issues about the shape, appearance, size or even function of their penis. It becomes an antidote of confidence as you accept the adoration and love being showed to you. Regardless of the descriptions of the giver, worshipping a penis can be done in various of ways.
Many individuals aim to celebrate everything about their partner’s cock and strive to make them feel empowered, dominate, and aroused. Of course, this can be done with a strap on as well. It reinforces dominate and submissive roles. Many set the environment up for play. Perform a sort of ceremonial style environment. There are two sides to every experience so give it a shot, it has some great benefits, including healing emotional scars about past penis insecurities. Many people feel happy when they can make others feel happy. This excitement on the givers part adds pleasure to the scene. Use it to say, “Thank you for this penis.” Penis worship allows you to get all your sexual adoration out and grow closer with your partner.
The environment is important when it comes to cock worship. As it is a sensual practice, you have got to create and equally sensual environment. It is hard to focus on the ceremony if you have laundry in the corner of your eye or the bed unmade. Remove such distractions and make the room as sensual as possible with accessories, scents, and candles. Dimming the lights and presenting yourself clean, groomed, and prepared. We know that the receiver has a better experience when the groundwork to discover his hang-ups and pain points before play, allows them to relax into the experience or take control of the situation. The more things that they like that you can include in the ritual the better it will be. For it to be a great experience, you need to have enough time to do everything you want to do. It is not the same as a blowjob, allow yourself to focus fully on the ceremony and enjoy every part of it no matter how long it takes.
Whether you are in your bedroom, living room or local dungeon, do your best to set the space. Then invite them into it to let the scene began. You can start with light kissing and then based on the situation undress your mate or lower their pants. Be sure that you are giving them enough time to warm up. This is important as you must be aroused to produce orgasm. If you don’t allow them this time, not only will it take longer but you will see less cock to worship. Pick up on signs of pleasure and arousal before you begin the ceremony fully. Slide down to the level of the cock and be sure you are enthusiastic about what you see. That is the whole purpose. To show them how much you love and appreciate their penis.
Start slow and work your way up to the bigger stuff. Focus on each individual area of the genitalia. This includes the cock, balls, taint, and butt if you know your mate is into these things. Lightly touching and kissing the cock and these areas is a good way to start your worship. Your hands become important if you can use them in the right way. You are not going to jerk the penis off. This is not a hand job either. This is much different, instead of jerking you massage the penis. If you find yourself doing the actions of a hand job you may shorten the experience by making them cum. You should try to use your hands to massage and show adoration to the cock, slow, deep massaging movements. Of course, adding oils makes it a little more sensual.
Next, get your mouth involved. Don’t fall into a blow job, keep up slower movement that focus on areas of the cock. Use your tongue to stimulate the tip of the penis, hold it in your mouth to feel its fullness. If you really like the feel of a cock in your month, let them know this. It may give them more pleasure knowing that you are enjoying their most powerful source. When the scene is over, you and your mate should debrief and discuss how confident, aroused, and empowered they feel. This may bring up a request for further play. They may ask you to do something you already did or have some other idea of worship they want you to perform. Lastly, the worship may or may not bring release to the receiver so you may have to finish them off. You can move onto some sexual things that help you both climax.
Finally, use one of these positions to deliver the best worship scene. The kneeling BJ position requires you to be on your knees in front of them while they are standing upright. The Boss Chair is to have the receiver sit in a comfortable chair and then you kneel in front of them. This should place the cock right where you need it to make worshipping comfortable for you. This makes it easier for you to position close enough to perform in this position that gives the receiver a sense of empowerment. The Doctor Position is performed on a sofa. They lie down with their head propped up on the armrest or pillow. You kneel at the side of the sofa to perform worship. This is a totally relaxing position allowing them to focus fully on you and your worship.
Using the technique of the Lingam-heart ritual, you can control the flow of sexual energy between two partners. The Lingam is a Sanskrit word that means ‘wand of light.’ Place one hand on the ‘Lingam(cock)’ and the other on their heart and picture the flow of energy between these two points. Again, get your accessories together and add them into the game. Role play and if you want to reverse the roles, pussy worship is just the same. Learn more about this sacred practice. It is not something that you should do every day. Keep it a special act that you can do when you have the time. There is more than the orgasm to be enjoyed by participants. Regardless of what your skill level in BDSM scenes, you can learn to worship a penis. You can learn to use energy and space to create a level of arousal that they may release. There is much more that you can do with the penis born body, but I will tell you that in another article. Have a great month full of orgasms.