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Relationships are hard…..

Relationships take work.  Extra work.  Partly because society defines what relationships are supposed to look like and partly because coupling means you must lend parts of yourself to your partner and that is where the hard work comes in.  In order to give, you must have what is needed.  Which means you must keep yourself at a level where you are not giving up too much of yourself.  That you are not losing yourself into the relationship and any pitfalls it may have.

If your partner needs emotional support, be there for them. But if the request requires you to go outside of values or self-identified breaking points, then you have to be able to stand up for yourself and let your partner know that you are unable to support them at the given time on the given topic.

There are several ways that you can let your partner know that you love and care for them.  Things that you can do to keep lust alive, keep the gates of communication open and be sexually fulfilled.  Being able to do things such as giving validation, compliments and emotional support. Be all in love, intimacy, sex and romance. Be willing to work through difficulties and disagreements.  Having a sense of humor may help you move through challenges. Naturally we want constant, kind and honest communication which includes being open to sharing life’s lessons with them.

Communication is key. Having something to say is very important. Most of us can talk forever with our parents, platonic friends or even ourselves, but find it hard to speak to someone who we have a romantic relationship with.  This means that you may have to practice how to converse without running out of thing to say.  You can overcome running out of things to say by practicing conversing.

Talk about what you enjoy. Your mate will respond to your passion about the topic.  Show your interest in a conversation by talking about traveling, or work in an amusing way.  Be sure you leave room for your mate to share a story as well.  Ask lots of questions.  I mean, don’t drill them, just ask questions about their day, their past and possibly what the future looks like.  Make something silly interesting. Joking starts a conversation about something silly and is a great conversation continuance.  If you had to tell a story about something you hate or that bothers you, don’t sound like your whining about it. You want them to believe that you are sharing something intimate.

Try to say the right thing without stressing about it.  This again, will show confidence and confidence is sexy.  Neutral conversations are best when you are trying to stay connected with your mate. Be sure you express sexual interest when appropriate in conversations.  A silent moment in the conversation is not necessarily a bad thing. Use it to collect your thoughts, absorb what your mate is saying or simply to enjoy each other. 

Relationships are hard.  The longer they last, the more you need to work at it.  Keeping things fresh and keeping the connection alive is crucial.  Don’t let society tell you what your relationship should look like. Use the power of communication to create a relationship that is absolutely amazing for the both of you.

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AllAuthor Interview

Debra Shade wrote her first book on the back of her 8th-grade homework. Former freelance writer for Outlook Magazine, author and sexpert, Debra has stretched the walls of erotic writing further than even she imagined. Her hobbies include writing, hosting monthly events, and networking. Debra has entered the literary world with a splash and is here to please all her readers. Read full interview…

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The Squirt Watch

November is coming. One of the sexiest months in the calendar.  Many look to bun up beginning in November. This could mean a lot of different things for all of us.  Depends on what you are looking for, now is the best time to put yourself out there and find your match.  It is cool that you can now use technology to have your dates. Technology has been changing the way we date, how we meet people, how we began to build friendships and love connections. There is a short jump to realize that technology helps us have better sexual experiences. We have been headed down this path for over a generation. We have 3D pornography where you can actual put yourself in many pleasurable situations. We have gone from blow up dolls to 150 lbs. real skin love dolls. Dolls that are getting more and more advance as we progress with the technology to continue to humanize these toys.

As an orgasm coach, I look for sex aids that can improve individual orgasms. Reviewing these products so that I can suggest them when needed has opened a very sexual tech world for me.  I must share with you a product that I saw while attending the AVN in Las Vegas a while ago.  The item is an aid for one of my most sought after orgasm – squirting. I have taught the art of fingering for many years.  I have never seen a product like this, and it would have saved me hours of technique training.  The Squirt Watch is a hand-crafted watch that teaches the speed and force needed to bring a vulva born individual to a squirting orgasm.

I recently watched a documentary on the Squirt Watch and immediately knew that I needed to introduce this product to my clients and followers. Foremost, the product is hand made by a guy named Aaron and is based on the expert skills of known porn star Marcus London.  Marcus is known for his ability to bring about a squirting orgasm. He and Aaron where able to determine the speed and force that he uses and created technology in the form of a watch that would be worn during the act of fingering that reads the speed and force the user is exerting.

What is awesome about this, is the technology is placed in a watch.  Something you often forget to take off before sex.  While it does not tell time, it does read red, yellow and green indicators based on your arm position, force and speed being used.  The measurement of speed and force are independent, meaning you can work on achieving force or speed as baby steps in performance. There is an active mode and a standby mode, it is battery operated which looks to be very easy to replace.  You can use this function in pauses so that you don’t have to power up the watch between use.  Of course, the watch is water resistant!! Considering that its purpose is to produce fluid, it may very well get wet in good use.  No worries, Aaron thought of that and has taken care of that. The comfortable strap is widely adjustable and can be worn on either arm.

While its use is self-explanatory, it took me a few tries before I got my force and speed up to bring my wife to a squirting orgasm but she was able to enjoy the experience in record time. There is a lighting scale of red, yellow and green that teaches you the correct amount of speed and force to bring orgasmic vulva owners to ejaculate. I can say that this product will give you a lot of bang for your buck.  To hold the key to elicit a squirting orgasm for vulva owners is a game changer.

Anyone looking to learn this skill can acquire one of these watches at timetosquirt online. Save $20 with my promo code: Shadeyontop. You will never spend better money. Become an expert of the most sought-after orgasm on earth.